Saturday January 24th 7pm
Rock River Tap Bar & Grill
110 W. Lake Street, Horicon
A spelling bee fundraiser for people who (maybe) can’t spell. So what if you misspell “Conscientious?!” Gather a team of friends — after all, ONE of your friends must be able to spell, right? Teams should be between three and five people. Phoenix “experts” can fill in teams with fewer people.
Entry fee: $25 per team
RULES & TIPS
1. Go crazy with your team name. This is supposed to be fun (but fierce competitively nonetheless—be prepared for mild heckling).
2. Heckling must cease during pronunciation and spelling of a word, but feel free to continue in-between. Trash talk should be in the spirit of bonhomie and benevolent sportsmanship, of course.
3. You can have 2-6 people in your team. If you can’t even scrape up 2 people (remember, not being to spell well is OK!) we will have a couple of spare spellers on hand. However, the spare spellers neither contribute to the team entry fee nor do-over purchases, nor do they earn the “amazing” prizes.
4. Bring friends and family to witness your humiliation and/or triumph. We want a big crowd, so even if your friends refuse to spell, bring them along.
5. No looking words up (duh)—so all cell phones and electronic devices, dictionaries, word lists, etc. are strictly forbidden. ALL DEVICES MUST BE TURNED OFF AT BEGINNING OF THE BEE AND PLACED ON TOP OF THE TABLES. OFF, not SILENT. We mean it and we’ll be watching all you sneaky under-the-table texting types. If you are concerned about keeping in contact with kids or whatever, a volunteer may take care of your phone if you give them a list of names/numbers that are critical. They will bring you a message if there is some emergency.
6. Your team can purchase up to 4 do-overs if you botch a word. The do-overs cost $2, $5, $10, & $20, respectively. We encourage you to both mess up and to buy do-overs, because we want your money. We reserve the right to allow more do-overs for all teams, if everyone seems both wealthy and egregiously poor at spelling. Teams can also buy second chances on other teams’ misspelled words, for the same rates as the do-overs ($2, $5, $10, & $20). We may offer more do-over opportunities.
7. Order plenty of Spell Yeah drinks, which will be available in alcoholic and virgin forms. They cost ever so slightly more than regular drinks, but this is GOOD: we get a % of each drink, and the more you imbibe the alcoholic kind, the likelier you are to need to buy do-overs for your spelling atrocities. Obviously stay safe with the drinking & appoint a designated driver.
8. Judges will do their utmost to ensure that they hear and understand your spelling (despite the loud boos and whistles from the crowd) and may record and replay your spelling attempt. That said, they’re human and may make a mistake or ask you to spell the word again. If they blow it, we’re sorry, but the judges’ rulings are final. No appeals.
9. We’re using Merriam-Webster’s Collegiate Dictionary, eleventh edition, accepting only American spelling, though alternates in the dictionary will be accepted. We may mispronounce words. You can ask if it’s mispronounced, and we’ll do our best to correct it, but we promise you nothing. We reserve the right to be stupid.
10. You may not write words down. You can ask for them to be used in a sentence. We may give definitions, if you ask. No root words or “derived from Latin” any of that other nonsense. Unless we feel like it. The pronouncer reserves the right to add information at will. And we may give bad and/or misleading definitions. It’s all part of the fun!
11. Having started to spell a word, a speller may stop and start over, retracing the spelling from the beginning, BUT in retracing there can be NO change of letters or their sequence from those first pronounced. If any letters or their sequence is changed in the respelling, the word is considered misspelled. In other words, a speller can’t correct himself. So make sure what comes out of your mouth is what you meant to say.
12. Upon the judges’ determination that a word is misspelled, the speller’s team will have a chance to buy a do-over (see #5). The SAME speller will attempt the do-over. You can spend all your do-overs on one word if you want, by all means.
13. There will not be an official time limit for each word in this particular spelling bee. However if the pronouncer or judge feels that a participant is repeatedly taking too much time to spell each word, they will be reminded to speed up their responses. If this request is ignored, they may be eliminated and/or made fun of.
14. Judges will eliminate anyone who takes too long, is obnoxious, is unintelligible, or wears ugly shoes. (We’re joking about the shoes. Sort of). Teams will have to soldier on without eliminated members. No gaming this rule—we’ll double the times the “poor” speller is in the lineup if we even suspect that some team is trying to eliminate their worst spellers.
15. Spelling is a team effort: you will be given about 10-15 seconds to come up with a consensus on the spelling your team feels best about. We may change this format on occasion to keep things lively.
16. First place winners will get trophies. Everyone gets the satisfaction of supporting the Phoenix Program’s awesome Concerts in the Park.
17. We encourage you to donate even more money to the Horicon Phoenix Program. After all, a team of four, who use all their do-overs, will only be out $15.50 each (not counting drinks) for this night of hilarity and community-building. And that’s nothing—you couldn’t buy popcorn at the movies for that much. So if you’re flush, help us out. Want to know what we’d do with your money? www.horiconphoenix.com